“The choices you make determine the oneness you enjoy. Isolation is Satan’s chief strategy for destroying marriage. Your marriage is deeply influenced by the culture in which you live, and much of that influence does not encourage oneness . Most couples have not adequately prepared for the gravitational pull of difficult adjustments on the marriage relationship.” – Dennis Rainey
The world we live in is full of built in distractions that can pull us away from the relationships that matter the most to us. We have to be intentional about keeping our primary relationships healthy. We can stay connected by Organizing our schedule around priorities instead of pressures.
This done by seperating and distinquishing our OBLIGATIONS and our OPTIONS in our schedules. One of the best ways to do this process is to take some time to ask some questions to clarify your priorities:
1. What are our 5 most important priorities for our family?
2. What some things we are currently doing that are keeping us from living by our priorities?
3. What are some things we can eliminate or cut back in our schedule that isn’t that necessary?
4. Put your Priorities in your schedule and on your calendar.
It is important to decide on a mutual time to discuss weekly schedule, maybe Sunday afternoon or evening, just before the week begins to adapt and adjust to last minute changes.
It is also important to Continue to “Date” your mate. Be creative, don’t get into a boring routine.
Develop a list of things you enjoy doing together, things you can do locally that are simple and inexpensive. It will not happen on a regular basis unless you put your date on your calendar. It will keep other things crowd intonyour time together.This also prevents your spouse from feeling that they are unimportant to you and not just get the “leftovers” of your time.
We also stay connected by taking time to Listen to each other each day . It is best to do this without distractions if possible. During your talk, be sure to ask follow up questions. This way you will find out more about really going on in their world that day. This often only takes a few minutes but it is time well spent. As you talk and listen to each other , do so in a way that honors the God who blessed you with a family. Psalms 19:14 (CEV) describes in this way: ” Let the words and my thoughts be pleasing to you, Lord.”
In staying connected with your children, take time to ask them about their day. It is also good for you as a parent or grandparent, whenever it is possible to take time to volunteer with your kids activities at church, school, sports and other things.
Staying connected with your family is worth the effort…